The relationship between a parent and child is sacred. The purity and wholesomeness of the relationship can never compare to another. But as the child matures so does the relationship. As an infant you are highly dependent on your parents for the fulfilment of your every whim and fancy. However, as you grow, you crave independence, a sense of freedom which changes the equation you bear with your parents. Instead of them catching you when you fall literally, the relationship transforms to doing so figuratively.

A parent is always considered to be the backbone of a child's support system, from them stems life itself and everything that pertains to sustenance. However, does this necessarily have to translate to you being your ward's foremost confidant? Are you your child's guiding force as well as their 'yaar'?

We all have different parenting strategies but the underlying objective of it will always be the welfare of your child. Do we achieve this by living in ignorance of our children's shenanigans or do we monitor their every move? The fundamentals of your relationship boils down to your perception on things backed by the following:

1. Openness

It is extremely essential to have an open channel of communication whether the topics in question are sensitive, awkward or just plain conversational. Holding back your opinion adversely affects your child’s willingness to share.


2. No judgement

The root of the problem: teenagers experiment. There is only so much nagging and advice can help, beyond that they will do as they see right. And what is wrong with that? You and I have done that and that is exactly how we learnt the most grievous and enriching lessons of life. The important part is to view this without judgement, listen to their problems or/and actions and do not cloud your opinion with negative judgement.


3. Patience

The greatest virtue a teenager's parent requires is patience. They can potentially drive you up the wall with their words and actions but the key is to take a few deep breaths and keep calm.


4. Trust

Believing and trusting doesn't come easy to a majority of parents. 'Where? What? And with whom?' are the first words out of our mouths when we are informed about an outing. But at one point or the other, letting go is the only answer. Verifying every fact and alibi more often than not is counterproductive.

A parent-child relationship is a precarious balance to establish and maintain. Let's face it, being a teenager isn't a cake-walk either. Coping with peer pressure and academic competition does not always leave much scope for individuality. Moreover, changing social norms leaves a child torn between family beliefs and prevailing societal behaviour.

Therefore, does accepting their lifestyle, no questions asked, make you a good parent? Is ignoring their rash decisions acceptable? Is it okay to give them complete independence and to trust them blindly? And is being their best friend the only solution? No doubt that being their friend, their companion and confidant is essential but being their best friend, not necessarily. All any child needs is love, guidance and a push in the right direction.

Team MSN She